I am a diehard fan of OSHO and have admired the man for his intellect, rebellion, philosophical preaching, sex and meditation. I am a regular at the ashram in Pune but I still can remember my first time there. I walked in one day for the morning meditation with my maroon robes into the huge pyramid shaped hall that is specially built for meditation and the transfer of energy. The place is full of foreigners and most of the instructors are European or American. So here I was jumping up and down chanting OSHO OSHO as the laughing meditation started. We were asked to throw our hands up in the air, jump and chant vigorously. Everyone went into a frenzy as the drum beat went into overdrive and then suddenly there was a pause and everyone froze in their current postures. Everyone became still and quiet. This on and off period of frenzy and silence is called dynamic meditation and is very popular in the ashram. When one is suddenly still, a pause appears in the mind as thoughts become nothing and a blanket of blankness overtakes the mind. For a few glimpses, one is able to experience the state of no mind as the pause expands and emptiness remains.
I was trying to get the pause but my damn car keys in my pocket kept jiggling and making a noise when I started to dance. It kept happening again and again till the angry instructor walked up to me and asked me to leave the auditorium. She saw me through the gate and was unpleasant in my behaviour. She said “Hey, you go back to your hotel room. You are disturbing everyone’s meditation. Look at you, you have such a funny face. You even look like a monkey!” I was heartbroken as I walked out into the garden and sat on a bench musing to myself. A thought appeared within me. “I am in the house of a man who got thrown out from everywhere in the world. Where does a man go who gets thrown out of his house?”
With this thought humming in my mind, I wandered to the cafeteria and sat down with my fellow meditators to chat. I asked them the same question. Finally, as I was about to grab some breakfast, an old lady who had heard my conversation with the others walked up to me and said “Son, there is still a place you can go to and that place is within.”
Bang! I got my answer. Yes indeed, within is the last refuge for us all and one can retreat inwards at any time no matter what.